PART 1C: THE PERFECT PAIRING

Whether it’s a take-out, simple grub from your local kibanda, or a 7-course experience at a fancy restaurant, good food is good food. But what distinguishes good from great (at least in my opinion) isn’t just the appearance, flavour, or taste of the food. It’s also the setting, the ambience, the sensations, the vibes. Accompanying good food with that little extra something makes the experience so much more worthwhile. It’s probably one of the reasons chefs are so particular about what sauce, what dressing, what drink etc., should be paired in what order, and with which dish.

There is no such thing as a self-made person. We’re all products of our genetics, our upbringing, our experiences, and our environment. Even as we evolve, all these things continue to shape who we are and who we’re becoming. In the same breadth, when it comes to “making it” or simply getting your feet wet, merit and hard work alone aren’t enough. Truly fulfilling your purpose also requires external action from agents, catalysts, and stimuli. Who you know, how they vouch for you, and their proficiency in speaking about you (in places of importance) is paramount. The people you invest in have a profound impact on your future…so choose your pairing wisely, your career quite literally depends on it!

High performers aren’t always good managers. Many companies promote high performers to supervision positions without the critical assistance, training and accountability tools needed to develop their people management skills. Why? They often don’t have the resources or time to invest in people development and/or forego it altogether because it’s deemed as less important. The result, is inexperienced managers leading frustrated teams. As a matter of fact, one of the top reasons people resign from their jobs is poor management, and toxic bosses. Outside of yourself, the most influential change-maker in your career is your direct line manager. Not only are you likely to work most closely with this person, but you are answerable to them. More crucially, they’re responsible for providing feedback, evaluating your performance, and determining whether or not you should advance. Having a good manager can literally make or break your work experience.

My first big girl job came with the bonus of a great manager! Starting on a good foot was a true blessing. It enabled me to understand what to expect and how to navigate accordingly. But for those who’ve been jaded as first entrants to the workforce, it’s hard to know what to anticipate. At the minimum a manager should, i) set and communicate clear targets, timelines, and deliverables; ii) check in with you; iii) support, problem-solve, and unlock capacity; and, iv) provide career development assistance. This is the bare minimum. Regrettably, for anyone working in an early-stage VC, your manager likely can’t do 70% of these things. At various points in my startup journey, I worked directly or indirectly with a slew of different managers. Managers who had little to no people management experience, others who weren’t intentional about providing guidance, others too that struggled to create space for collaboration, and others still that had a decade of management experience but were blatantly self-motivated and complacent. In cases where my manager fell short of their core people management responsibilities, I found it incredibly challenging to work. It caused a lot of second-guessing, a lot of anxiety, a lot of overcompensation, and a lot of conflict…and in some extreme cases, my resignation — more on setbacks, failure and betrayal in Parts 3.

My first boss was everything an eager, ambitious, and goal-oriented newbie could have desired! He was wickedly smart, direct, organized, patient, kind, observant and driven. We shared a lot of the same values (e.g. trust, integrity, ethics), and worked very well together. He knew when to challenge, when to acknowledge and praise, and when to give constructive feedback. And because we had a working relationship built on mutual understanding and respect, it made it easier to be open and to learn without taking things personally. The thing I valued most about being managed by him was his ability to not just identify my potential but to harness it. He was very intentional about how I spent my time and whom I shadowed. He sought out relevant opportunities based on my areas of interest and was incredibly strategic about introducing me to people of influence. I learned so much from him about professionalism, partnership, diplomacy and hard work.

Photo credit (Jonathan Soki Ochako): Camel herder walking his caravan across the Watamu coastline.

There is a distinct difference between mentorship and sponsorship. While both are necessary and beneficial to navigating the professional workspace, the former nurtures and guides, while the latter champions and advocates. Mentorship is simply the core support an individual needs to gain confidence, think strategically about work-related challenges, and apply themselves accordingly. While some mentorship is more structured than others, ultimately it allows the beneficiary - the mentee - to take a step back, evaluate, assess, and brainstorm with someone more experienced. Mentorship allows the mentee to ultimately find a way forward for professional obstacles faced e.g. dealing with poor leadership, getting a promotion or raise, managing time more effectively, etc. Sponsorship, on the other hand, goes a step further. It’s when someone who knows you well champions for you. This includes recommending you for opportunities, vouching for your character and your work in and outside of the workplace, and helping you navigate your career in more strategic ways e.g. career shifts, apprenticeships, etc. Unlike mentorship which is usually spurred or sought by the mentee, sponsorship can happen with or without instigation or consent.

Whether deliberate or not, having someone in your corner is cardinal. To find that someone, you must be calculated. Who do you want to be? Who inspires you and why? What do you want to achieve? If you were successful what would this look like? Is there someone who’s already done what I aim to do? Asking yourself such questions is a great start. At the end of the day, the person or persons who fill the role of mentor and/or sponsor in your life should be experienced, have similar ideals and values, and be available to and for you. They don’t have to be someone you work with directly, nor do they have to be someone in your sector. Provided they’re available, willing to get to know you and your work, and can help you navigate your how-tos, you’re on the right path.

Labels can be helpful, but equally harmful. I am a young professional. I am also a woman (she/her), I am also black, and I am also Kenyan-born and Kenyan-raised. Why does it matter? The VC and tech space in Nairobi is incredibly small. We know each other, we support each other’s businesses, we network, we often have the same investors, and we operate in very similar ways. And when it comes to setting up a VC and fundraising in particular, the parameters set (consciously or unconsciously) are often distorted and weaponized against young businesses founded and/or majorly led by any of the aforementioned identifiers - black, woman, African….the list is infinite. While I am still processing what such biases mean for me, a truth that remains constant is the power of leveraging your labels, especially in this misrepresented and underrepresented Nairobi tech scene. At times this has meant having very candid conversations with my mentors (e.g. calling out and determining how to navigate situations where decisions of privilege are being exercised), and other times it meant working with my sponsors to leverage my strengths for opportunities based on firsts (e.g. first woman-led, first youth-led, first Kenyan-born etc). Understanding who you are, how you identify, and how the world sees you, is salient. It helps you set a baseline for who to partner with and how to circumvent some of the obstacles you’ll undoubtedly face.

In as much as finding a good mentor or sponsor is important, being a good mentee or sponsee is just as significant. It means understanding your needs and wants, identifying who is in the best position to support, guide and/or advocate, and actively chasing this person. You can’t be passive…you need to set time aside to check in, be clear about what you need help with, and work proactively to build and maintain a relationship with them. This can manifest in several ways e.g. standing check-ins (monthly, quarterly), sharing agendas or areas of support ahead of time, sharing progress updates etc. For me, it’s been a combination of all. Structured at times (e.g. G.Cals, itemized agendas, resource materials) and unstructured (e.g. post-work drinks, lunch, walk and talks) other times. Being a good mentee also means accepting that you are still learning, being open to alternative ways of doing things, and being able to receive constructive feedback (it’s about the work and not your character). At the end of your day your mentor and/or sponsee is more experienced, has wisdom to impart, and is in your corner..they want (or should want) what is best for you.

Notwithstanding the very real efforts I made to invest in supportive professional relationships, most of the mentors and sponsors I gained in my early career were a result of stumbling vs. actively seeking. My mentors and sponsors were people I worked with and/or those who directly managed me. This meant that I didn’t have the time to take a step back and ask myself important questions like; i) do I truly want to opt into this relationship, ii) what do I hope to gain out of it; iii) is this the best person to help me navigate? The downside of not actively seeking is that once your time has lapsed and/or your mentor or sponsor is out of the picture, you’re less likely to reach out or seek guidance. Who I was 5 years ago, who I am now, and who I’ll be 5 years from now is different. As I continue to grow in my career, I’m trying to be more purposeful about finding the right mentors and sponsors. I’m taking more time to understand and articulate my shortcomings, but even more so my needs, desires, and visions for who I want to be and how to get there. It will require serious auditing, stalking and diligence anew, and openness to going beyond my current areas of comfort and familiarity.

To succeed in the dynamic startup space, you need to have good people in your corner. Investing in a mentor and/or sponsor allows you to learn from experience, receive and learn to solicit feedback for continuous improvement, and consciously navigate what you want and how to get it. Whomever you choose, remember to be clear and explicit. The only way forward is through and together.

The startup pathway is hard, lonely, and tiresome. Better to find a companion to travel with than go at it on your own. A great pairing goes a longer way.